For all our gripes and grumbles, Facebook is a wonderful thing. It's a way of still feeling connected to people back home even though we don't see them for months at a time.
While that's true of the Internet in general, sometimes it really is the mundane day-to-day posts on Facebook that are the most comforting. These are the posts people scoff at and dismiss as silly, but for a homesick person far away? They are the warm routine of a familiar life. Crazy Boston drivers; snow falling over the Charles; a disappointing baseball season... these are all, simply, Home.
What's great about Facebook/Twitter/LJ etc. is that these were ways we were keeping in regular touch with people before the move. With the craziness of work, and friends having babies, and just life in general being hectic for everyone, we rarely saw most people in person more than every couple of months. But with LJ and social media, we were in frequent contact. I know that so-and-so has a new job, or that cute-toddler is now walking, or that so-and-so is sick and could use a chicken soup drop-off. It's not a replacement for in-person communication, but it suffices for the time between in-person get togethers. And so many of our friends are long distance to begin with; phone and email were already the primary form of contact.
And so this move is less isolating than it would have been, say, 10 years ago. Sure, 10 years ago there was email, but one of the things I like about social media is that it is reminiscent of Usenet - group conversations. I can read a conversation, or participate, or start one of my own. Especially with blog spaces, it feels like I can write something once and post it once, instead of having a dozen independent email conversations with a dozen different people about the same thing.
It's not that I don't miss people. But I know I'll be home for Christmas, and see people then. And there is the good old-fashioned telephone when we need to hear someone's voice.
What's been difficult is adapting to the new reality with people with whom social media hasn't been a part of our regular routine. It's similar to the layoffs last year - seeing someone every day for years, and then bam, they're not there, is really difficult. Tossing a showtune over the wall, and catching its return. Baked goods at a weekly team meeting which always involved lots of laughter. Plotting evil April Fool's Day pranks for the website that we were always too nice to actually make. The abrupt departure of this team and our interactions was really painful.
This move wasn't abrupt in the same way, but it is similar in that I'm adapting to new ways to communicate with some people. Neffie and Neecey, for instance. Obviously they are not on Facebook (yet - just give FB time to find a way to safely monetize children!). And while their parents post cute photos that I eagerly "like" and smile at, it's not the same as playing hide and seek or dancing to the Muppets.
But we're starting to Skype with Neffie, and I'm finding it helps immensely. It's certainly not the same, but having them dial in while we're singing happy birthday to Arthur feels like maybe we're not missing everything. (Granted, it also helps that Neffie is now old enough to talk, even if he's still shy over Skype. His little Mahna Mahna performances crack us up.)
I've used phone and Facebook to catch up with former cow orkers. Again, people that I sat with every day for years - so nice to just chat once in a while. Or exchange political humor with my old boss. It's a way of feeling normal. Like I'll see her next week.
One of the other transitions was the absence of YankeeFan. Right before we left, he had to leave the country unexpectedly. So he was offline for over a month. And I was so used to our random text messaging that being cut off from that became quite noticeable. In fact, it was the return of the text messages that made me reflect on communication styles and draft this post in the first place. (The return of the text messages made things feel "normal", like my communications network was complete again. It was the last incomplete piece.)
It's definitely the people with whom Facebook/LJ isn't our primary form of regular correspondence that I miss the most, and I didn't realize that until one of those other forms was restored. We are *so* *used* to being able to talk to anyone, anywhere, any time in this day and age. Thank you Internetz! We are so spoiled. But when that's taken away? Or isn't relevant? Then I feel the distance. Then I feel homesick.
Of course, all that being said, it's been a long semester and it'll be great to see people in person when we're home. But in the meantime, I am glad that we have a plethora of communication technologies and we each have our own preferred methods.
Tuesday, November 27, 2012
Monday, November 19, 2012
Hot sausage and mustard!
A while ago, JP suggested we write about which restaurants we liked in Ann Arbor. Unfortunately, we're not eating out very often due to the whole student budget thing, so I passed on that topic.
However, now it's Thanksgiving week, and what better time to write about food?
While we're not eating out very often, we've now been here long enough that we have tried a few places - and, of course, know where we want to go next (Zingerman's Roadhouse).
---
We lucked out on our first celebration dinner. The night before Orientation began (we wanted to splurge on one last meal before the semester started), we looked at a few reviews and menus, and Arthur picked a place on a whim. It was very good -- exactly what we were looking for -- and our only regret is having been too full to try any dessert. Sadly, we're unlikely to go back anytime soon, because the few times we eat out at that price range, we'd like to try somewhere new(-to-us). But I do want to make it back to try their bread pudding, at the very least.
Usually when we eat out, it's part of a social gathering. Which is how I learned that Arbor Brewing Company has vegan nachos, or that Aut Bar has a giant inflatable spider dangling from the ceiling. It's a great way of learning my way around without having to throw darts at a map.
Recently, we were at a social dinner over in Ypsi where I ordered the gnocchi of the day. This is worthy of note because it was a gnocchi poutine. I normally cannot eat poutine. But their dish used sheep cheese instead of cow cheese, so I delightfully ate what might be the best gnocchi dish I've ever had.
---
In fact, many of the restaurants we've eaten at feature goat or sheep cheese instead of cow cheese. Much more than at home. (I'd say it's based on our distance from Vermont, but we're too close to Wisconsin for that logic to apply.) It's made me incredibly happy, and less constrained by menu choices. (Alas, the cheaper student joints are generally less likely to incorporate non-cow dairy products.)
The other trend I've noticed out here is the use of duck. The above-mentioned gnocchi poutine had a duck gravy; the paella from the Local Food Festival used duck instead of seafood; and even the french fries from a food truck featured a thick duck gravy. I don't know whether this is a national foodie trend or just something that's popular around here, but I'm quite enjoying it. Duck isn't something we have very often - and certainly we don't make at home - so having it pop up in surprising places is a fun treat.
---
We have also started to check out the occasional cheap(er) takeout joints aimed at students, since, well, that's currently our price range. There was an Indian buffet we really liked because it had a completely different range of options than we're used to seeing in buffets back home. We'd never heard of half the dishes! Quite a break from the Indian restaurants in Boston that all seem to slowly be owned by the same company, with the same buffets.
I accidentally stumbled across my new favorite wrap when I was exiting the highway and desperately hungry. So I pulled over into a shopping area where I could put some gas in the tank, buy the grocery items I needed for dinner, and order a wrap before I passed out. It was good (and cheap) enough that I have intentionally sought it out since.
I think what we're missing is a cache of such places that we know we like and are affordable and we can go on a whim. We're still having to try places one by one (and since we so rarely eat out, it's a slow process) and learn for ourselves whether we like them or not. I now know where I can go for a great wrap. Next up is figuring out my best option for a burger.
Last time I was really anemic, we went to what Yelp had deemed the best burger near us, and it was.... not. Or, if it is, then I am SOL. 'Cause... yuck.
Josh and I went to a place next to central campus last week, and I had a decent burger so the anemia's gone. But we still need to find something closer to us. There looks to be a possibility across 23 that we'll try next. Because sometimes I just need a good burger.
---
I have intentionally been avoiding bakeries and chocolate shops (and book shops), because therein lies temptation. I did, however, find myself at the Zingerman's Bakehouse yesterday to order a birthday cake for Arthur. And, um, I hadn't had lunch yet, so I wound up bringing some other stuff home, too. I should probably not go back (at least not without adult supervision), because I have very little resistance to such wicked goodness.
We did explore some of the pies from the place across the street, because when visiting Lisa, one should bring pie. Scientific research, you see.
And there's a bakery at the farmers market that we really like. Oh hey wait - didn't we mean to get something from there for Thanksgiving dinner? Oops...
---
In general, the food scene seems to be quite similar to Boston in terms of variety of options. It's certainly smaller, and the ethnic populations are different enough that we should drive to Detroit if we want Caribbean food (it's southwestern/Mexican here), but there's also a wider variety of Middle Eastern food here. And because of the heavily Asian population here in Northwood, there are some great finds at the grocery store some days.
However, now it's Thanksgiving week, and what better time to write about food?
While we're not eating out very often, we've now been here long enough that we have tried a few places - and, of course, know where we want to go next (Zingerman's Roadhouse).
---
We lucked out on our first celebration dinner. The night before Orientation began (we wanted to splurge on one last meal before the semester started), we looked at a few reviews and menus, and Arthur picked a place on a whim. It was very good -- exactly what we were looking for -- and our only regret is having been too full to try any dessert. Sadly, we're unlikely to go back anytime soon, because the few times we eat out at that price range, we'd like to try somewhere new(-to-us). But I do want to make it back to try their bread pudding, at the very least.
Usually when we eat out, it's part of a social gathering. Which is how I learned that Arbor Brewing Company has vegan nachos, or that Aut Bar has a giant inflatable spider dangling from the ceiling. It's a great way of learning my way around without having to throw darts at a map.
Recently, we were at a social dinner over in Ypsi where I ordered the gnocchi of the day. This is worthy of note because it was a gnocchi poutine. I normally cannot eat poutine. But their dish used sheep cheese instead of cow cheese, so I delightfully ate what might be the best gnocchi dish I've ever had.
---
In fact, many of the restaurants we've eaten at feature goat or sheep cheese instead of cow cheese. Much more than at home. (I'd say it's based on our distance from Vermont, but we're too close to Wisconsin for that logic to apply.) It's made me incredibly happy, and less constrained by menu choices. (Alas, the cheaper student joints are generally less likely to incorporate non-cow dairy products.)
The other trend I've noticed out here is the use of duck. The above-mentioned gnocchi poutine had a duck gravy; the paella from the Local Food Festival used duck instead of seafood; and even the french fries from a food truck featured a thick duck gravy. I don't know whether this is a national foodie trend or just something that's popular around here, but I'm quite enjoying it. Duck isn't something we have very often - and certainly we don't make at home - so having it pop up in surprising places is a fun treat.
---
We have also started to check out the occasional cheap(er) takeout joints aimed at students, since, well, that's currently our price range. There was an Indian buffet we really liked because it had a completely different range of options than we're used to seeing in buffets back home. We'd never heard of half the dishes! Quite a break from the Indian restaurants in Boston that all seem to slowly be owned by the same company, with the same buffets.
I accidentally stumbled across my new favorite wrap when I was exiting the highway and desperately hungry. So I pulled over into a shopping area where I could put some gas in the tank, buy the grocery items I needed for dinner, and order a wrap before I passed out. It was good (and cheap) enough that I have intentionally sought it out since.
I think what we're missing is a cache of such places that we know we like and are affordable and we can go on a whim. We're still having to try places one by one (and since we so rarely eat out, it's a slow process) and learn for ourselves whether we like them or not. I now know where I can go for a great wrap. Next up is figuring out my best option for a burger.
Last time I was really anemic, we went to what Yelp had deemed the best burger near us, and it was.... not. Or, if it is, then I am SOL. 'Cause... yuck.
Josh and I went to a place next to central campus last week, and I had a decent burger so the anemia's gone. But we still need to find something closer to us. There looks to be a possibility across 23 that we'll try next. Because sometimes I just need a good burger.
---
I have intentionally been avoiding bakeries and chocolate shops (and book shops), because therein lies temptation. I did, however, find myself at the Zingerman's Bakehouse yesterday to order a birthday cake for Arthur. And, um, I hadn't had lunch yet, so I wound up bringing some other stuff home, too. I should probably not go back (at least not without adult supervision), because I have very little resistance to such wicked goodness.
We did explore some of the pies from the place across the street, because when visiting Lisa, one should bring pie. Scientific research, you see.
And there's a bakery at the farmers market that we really like. Oh hey wait - didn't we mean to get something from there for Thanksgiving dinner? Oops...
---
In general, the food scene seems to be quite similar to Boston in terms of variety of options. It's certainly smaller, and the ethnic populations are different enough that we should drive to Detroit if we want Caribbean food (it's southwestern/Mexican here), but there's also a wider variety of Middle Eastern food here. And because of the heavily Asian population here in Northwood, there are some great finds at the grocery store some days.
Monday, November 12, 2012
mid-semester reflections: I like this place
Fellow students and various other people I've met have been asking me how I'm liking U-M, and how it's compared to my pre-move expectations. The answer is that I'm liking it: it continues to surprise me and to surpass my expectations, if at times overwhelm me. The department's professors are high-quality, the breadth of the program is stunning, the peers are friendly and smart, and classes are giving me a lot to chew on. I'm liking it so much, actually, I'm even considering staying here an extra year (!)
That said, I still miss Boston, and I'm still adapting to not having a job to go to: I miss coworkers, users, and fixing things. Right now, if I replace my own hard drive? Dangerous operation that might leave me unable to pass a class. Where's the fun in that?
Two professors, and their energy and dedication, brought me to this program. I've been pleasantly surprised this fall by how engaged other professors have been. The symposium on sustainability and social justice brought this home: from what so many of them shared there, the faculty is paying attention, cares passionately, and admits personal conflict and uncertainty openly. That's worth a lot.
It's time to line up what classes we're taking for next semester: what courses will we rescue from the broad catalog into our narrow schedule? It doesn't make it any easier that almost without exception, every professor in our department has something unique to offer, and is good at sharing it. I know I'm staying away from real estate, and not getting too close to urban design or architecture, so that's a start. I want the time to talk through the problems that each of our professors is working on, and to get to know them and their styles, without the restriction of a course schedule. Tomorrow there's a course fair, where everyone who's teaching an elective says a little about it; hopefully that'll be a start.
I'm working on assembling a peer group of the wacky, the transportation geeky, and the askers of annoying questions. I'm well on my way. Other fellow students are friendly and helpful, even if I haven't made time to study together and socialize as much as I would have liked. In any case, we seem to be smart, studious, and fun, even if some of these whippersnappers have weird ideas of "fun". (I mean, doesn't a tailgate get boring after a couple hours?)
Classes are good if sometimes frustrating. Four of my classes have 35-60 students in them, so conversation is stilted and superficial. There's a lot to learn from the material, it's well chosen, and some classes have optional discussion sections. But it takes a lot of effort to get into the readings and to skim them purposefully, there's only so much to get from a lecture, and I'm strapped for time outside of class, so my attention wanders more than I'd like. Frustrating. Still, I have the building blocks of some good study habits and technologies, I'm working on putting them together in a stable arrangement, and regardless I'm absorbing a lot of good information.
Classes are playing off each other in interesting ways. I can explore this a little in papers for each class (well, primarily it's Theory's assignments that have enough latitude), but I'd love an opportunity to put the concepts and approaches together, and use them to critique each other. Perhaps a future post topic? I'll keep it under 1000 words, promise :-)
Overall, I'm happy to be here, a little giddy about future semesters' possibilities, and daunted by the challenge of fitting everything I want to learn here into 3 remaining semesters. In fact, I'm applying to the School of Natural Resources and Environment to add a second master's degree -- giving me two more semesters! It would be a Master of Science in Natural Resources and the Environment, with a specialization in Behavior, Education, and Communication, starting in earnest next Fall. I really like what I've seen of SNRE so far this fall (through the one seminar). My challenge right now is to focus on writing the application now, and weighing all the options as to whether to accept their offer if and when it comes. (Some considerations include their class sizes, how much funding I get next semester and for next year through their offer, and the retirement of one of the professors that made the BEC specialization so attractive.)
I'll keep you posted!
Monday, November 5, 2012
All politics is local
Election day is definitely daunting this year. The ballot here in Ann Arbor is huuuuuge, and we don't know enough about Michigan politics to feel comfortable voting for everything.
For example, after seeing signs saying "Save the library! Vote yes!" AND "Save the library! Vote no!", we read up on the issue. We've received emails about it. And still, we feel too much like outsiders. We're not sure what we're missing. And if we're outsiders, then who are we to vote for a tax increase that won't impact us, because we don't own a house here, and are unlikely to ever do so?
(Update: Lovely statement of the library issue from both sides at happy hour this evening. I still don't feel invested enough - it doesn't feel like my community yet - and may abstain from voting on the issue, but it makes more sense now. I miss the BPL, and that's part of the problem. So many of the books I'm looking for aren't in the system; I feel all homesick and spoilt.)
However, it's also the most convenient polling location I will probably ever have. That's certainly a plus.
Every state has its share of wacky politics. There are plenty of ways in which Massachusetts is screwed up. But I know those ways. Things are quite logical when you've grown up with them.
Here? I feel quite out of my depth. We've definitely been researching, and can make some informed decisions. And thankfully there are a couple of locals in Arthur's program who shared with him some of the background. For instance, Proposal 6 ("Initiative to amend the Michigan Constitution to require a vote of the people before the State of Michigan can construct or finance new international bridges or tunnels for motor vehicles") turns out to be funded by a rich guy who owns the current bridge privately and wants to maintain his monopoly on bridge tolls crossing to Canada. And the new bridge in question would be funded by Canada and the federal government, so no state revenue would be required. He just wants to squelch competition, and is using the state constitution to do so. (So much for the "free market"!)
What's getting to us about this - and other - statewide proposals is that nearly everything is at the [state] constitutional amendment level. !!! Proposal 2 ("Initiative to amend the Michigan Constitution to create a new right to collective bargaining") is the only one that seems to me to rise to the level of constitutional amendment.
In fact, there are proposals whose sentiments we agree with, but I feel strongly shouldn't be constitutional amendments! So, do I vote no, because it's a bad method, do I vote yes because I agree with the eventual outcome, or do I abstain because I'm new here and really have no idea WTF is going on? (Maybe everything here really is handled by constitutional amendment? Hm. Previous research showed that George Romney was heavily involved in the rewriting of the Mich. constitution. And also instituted the first state income tax here. Interesting.)
I remember Derik bemoaning the fact that in California it takes 2/3 of voters to approve tax changes, but a simple majority amends the constitution. So it's easier to ban same-sex marriage than to fund public transit.
Pshaw. It's an election. It's all about being judgmental!
That being said, one of the things that's overwhelming us is the sheer number of positions that are elected instead of appointed. Such as judges. And keeping track of which judges we want to vote for, because that part of the ballot is non-partisan. (Who knew that that West Wing reunion video was talking to us?) Oh, and there are some stark differences between some of these candidates. But since everyone's new to me, keeping track of who is who is starting to make my head hurt.
Plus there's the regents/trustees of U of M (in which Arthur should have a vested interest but again - we're too new here), as well as those of MSU, Washtenaw Community College, and Wayne State University. Talk about feeling clueless - this is it.
And state school board, in addition to local. I mean, I've had my trusty League of Women Voters website up for a week, and I still haven't gotten through the entire ballot. There's just way too much!
Then again, if it's what I was used to, I'd feel upset to have this power taken away if I moved to a state where everything is a political appointment.
I'm going to have to create a cheat sheet to bring in with me. I will not remember the names otherwise.
We've actually fared much better here. We've received calls from pollsters. And a couple of in-person canvassers (Prop 2, local DNC reps, etc.) stopped by. But NOTHING like the insanity of the last several years back home. Special Senate race, mayoral race, statehouse rep... nonstop calls for 3 years. And heck, we were even getting some spillover robocalls from the Gingrich campaign heading into the New Hampshire primary last winter!
It's been such a *relief* here to know it's safe to answer the phone. I don't want to jinx it, but apparently we're not on the phone list yet and I'm so ready to keep it that way.
Our snail mail, OTOH... we've gotten the exact same postcard from the local tea party folks (with an admirable URL) a dozen times now. I've been tempted to bring it with me to the polling center as a checklist of what to vote the opposite from.
Generally we're safe from t.v. ads because of the TiVO, but there have definitely been some seeping through. And YouTube, Hulu, and even my Android apps are very much focused on the proposals. Enough so that I actually caved and went to one of the advertised URLs and learned more. Gah! Make it stop!
Still, I miss being at home, and going to election night parties where we're all sitting at the edge of our seats hoping Warren pulls it off. I am so frustrated that I cannot vote for her. A Massachusetts election that actually Matters, and I'm no longer a resident!
In general, I've been settling in and thinking of here as "home". It's comfortable, and I'm finding things I like, and sending Neffie pictures and skyping with him help with the homesickness. But having an incredibly long ballot and feeling ignorant of all the history about everything is really driving home how much of an outsider I still feel. Michigan is still temporary, even if it's home.
For example, after seeing signs saying "Save the library! Vote yes!" AND "Save the library! Vote no!", we read up on the issue. We've received emails about it. And still, we feel too much like outsiders. We're not sure what we're missing. And if we're outsiders, then who are we to vote for a tax increase that won't impact us, because we don't own a house here, and are unlikely to ever do so?
(Update: Lovely statement of the library issue from both sides at happy hour this evening. I still don't feel invested enough - it doesn't feel like my community yet - and may abstain from voting on the issue, but it makes more sense now. I miss the BPL, and that's part of the problem. So many of the books I'm looking for aren't in the system; I feel all homesick and spoilt.)
However, it's also the most convenient polling location I will probably ever have. That's certainly a plus.
When in Rome
Every state has its share of wacky politics. There are plenty of ways in which Massachusetts is screwed up. But I know those ways. Things are quite logical when you've grown up with them.
Here? I feel quite out of my depth. We've definitely been researching, and can make some informed decisions. And thankfully there are a couple of locals in Arthur's program who shared with him some of the background. For instance, Proposal 6 ("Initiative to amend the Michigan Constitution to require a vote of the people before the State of Michigan can construct or finance new international bridges or tunnels for motor vehicles") turns out to be funded by a rich guy who owns the current bridge privately and wants to maintain his monopoly on bridge tolls crossing to Canada. And the new bridge in question would be funded by Canada and the federal government, so no state revenue would be required. He just wants to squelch competition, and is using the state constitution to do so. (So much for the "free market"!)
What's getting to us about this - and other - statewide proposals is that nearly everything is at the [state] constitutional amendment level. !!! Proposal 2 ("Initiative to amend the Michigan Constitution to create a new right to collective bargaining") is the only one that seems to me to rise to the level of constitutional amendment.
In fact, there are proposals whose sentiments we agree with, but I feel strongly shouldn't be constitutional amendments! So, do I vote no, because it's a bad method, do I vote yes because I agree with the eventual outcome, or do I abstain because I'm new here and really have no idea WTF is going on? (Maybe everything here really is handled by constitutional amendment? Hm. Previous research showed that George Romney was heavily involved in the rewriting of the Mich. constitution. And also instituted the first state income tax here. Interesting.)
I remember Derik bemoaning the fact that in California it takes 2/3 of voters to approve tax changes, but a simple majority amends the constitution. So it's easier to ban same-sex marriage than to fund public transit.
Judge Not Lest...
Pshaw. It's an election. It's all about being judgmental!
That being said, one of the things that's overwhelming us is the sheer number of positions that are elected instead of appointed. Such as judges. And keeping track of which judges we want to vote for, because that part of the ballot is non-partisan. (Who knew that that West Wing reunion video was talking to us?) Oh, and there are some stark differences between some of these candidates. But since everyone's new to me, keeping track of who is who is starting to make my head hurt.
Plus there's the regents/trustees of U of M (in which Arthur should have a vested interest but again - we're too new here), as well as those of MSU, Washtenaw Community College, and Wayne State University. Talk about feeling clueless - this is it.
And state school board, in addition to local. I mean, I've had my trusty League of Women Voters website up for a week, and I still haven't gotten through the entire ballot. There's just way too much!
Then again, if it's what I was used to, I'd feel upset to have this power taken away if I moved to a state where everything is a political appointment.
I'm going to have to create a cheat sheet to bring in with me. I will not remember the names otherwise.
Robocalls
We've actually fared much better here. We've received calls from pollsters. And a couple of in-person canvassers (Prop 2, local DNC reps, etc.) stopped by. But NOTHING like the insanity of the last several years back home. Special Senate race, mayoral race, statehouse rep... nonstop calls for 3 years. And heck, we were even getting some spillover robocalls from the Gingrich campaign heading into the New Hampshire primary last winter!
It's been such a *relief* here to know it's safe to answer the phone. I don't want to jinx it, but apparently we're not on the phone list yet and I'm so ready to keep it that way.
Our snail mail, OTOH... we've gotten the exact same postcard from the local tea party folks (with an admirable URL) a dozen times now. I've been tempted to bring it with me to the polling center as a checklist of what to vote the opposite from.
Generally we're safe from t.v. ads because of the TiVO, but there have definitely been some seeping through. And YouTube, Hulu, and even my Android apps are very much focused on the proposals. Enough so that I actually caved and went to one of the advertised URLs and learned more. Gah! Make it stop!
Homesick
Still, I miss being at home, and going to election night parties where we're all sitting at the edge of our seats hoping Warren pulls it off. I am so frustrated that I cannot vote for her. A Massachusetts election that actually Matters, and I'm no longer a resident!
In general, I've been settling in and thinking of here as "home". It's comfortable, and I'm finding things I like, and sending Neffie pictures and skyping with him help with the homesickness. But having an incredibly long ballot and feeling ignorant of all the history about everything is really driving home how much of an outsider I still feel. Michigan is still temporary, even if it's home.
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